How I view Italy as an expat and former resident

From “ciao bella” to “how’s she cutting”

Trieste’s international airport. Picture credits: Paola Bassanese

I was born in Trieste, Italy, and spent my formative years there.

I guess that, spending my childhood in Italy by the sea, there shouldn’t be anything to complain about as many people dream about that lifestyle. But when you reach your teenage years, you become restless and want to explore the world, or at least that’s how I felt. You need to scratch that itch and experience different realities, while pushing your own limits and boundaries.

What was life like in Trieste?

I remember being mostly bored and frustrated while I lived in Trieste. I was listening to a lot of English-speaking music and dreaming about moving to London.

It was clear to me that my hometown was geared towards catering for the needs of the elderly and retirees. Gentle walking down the promenade by the sea is of course very pleasant, but you stop enjoying it if it’s your main daily activity. Sports are quite big in Trieste, but if you don’t fancy joining a sports team the alternatives were jogging, cycling or going to the gym.

I did try going to the gym and joining a few dance classes like salsa dancing but I found that there weren’t many on offer at the time. Over the years things have changed and, after I had left Trieste more activities became available as well as festivals and concerts.

As a highly strung teenager I would stare at the see and fix my gaze at the horizon, planning my next adventures.

What I didn’t like about Trieste

I haven’t lived in other Italian towns and I’m sure places like Milan would have offered so much more in terms of entertainment and opportunities. I didn’t like the mentality in Trieste, where the majority of the time, if you proposed a new idea it would be stopped in its tracks and you would be told “it can’t be done”.

Something else that really frustrated me about the mentality was that people would judge you by the clothes you wore and the friends you had. I found it very difficult to have a circle of friends because you needed to get introduced to a group of friends and they vetted you. If you didn’t fit in you were out. For example, I joined an existing group of friends who had known each other for years and I got introduced by one of the members. We would go out for dinner and clubbing, but it took a long time before a smaller circle within the group would go on holiday together and I was invited to join.

Everything felt like hard work. It helps if you cultivate friendships from childhood or if you frequent the same places all the time, but if you are someone who craves novelty it becomes challenging.

I noticed that people would have a general mistrust of strangers and a coldness towards those who didn’t have their same background, all coupled with a lack of curiosity about other cultures.

I will make a longer post about my hometown in the future.

Ironically, at times Athlone, where I live now, can give you the same impression because most people had known each other since their school days and it takes a while to establish new friendships, which is why I find it easier to connect with other international expats as we share similar experiences.

Trieste. Picture credits: Paola Bassanese

Travelling to Italy for work